Here’s the context:
She told me that I was recognized as “highly gifted” around 1st or 2nd grade. Having gone to a charter elementary school, I’m sure this was a big thrill for my parents. It’s been a while since I’ve noticed that my potential was there all along.
With any encouragement comes a more positive spirit.
Then my mom says, “You used to be so funny when you were little. I thought you could have been a comedian”. I was silent, just smirking.
She then asks, “How did you end up doing in that class last semester where you thought you did horribly on that final exam. Did you get an A in the class?”
After a pause, I cheerfully said, “B+”. Here was my time to remind my mother that I was still her comedic son.
I said, “An A does not have ‘+’ in front of it. At least my B+ does”.
She started cracking up like the 4th of July. Her laughter was contagious because I started adding my own fireworks to the show.
Life is so simple at times. That just simple joy can come from a stupid or subtle joke.
However, without pain there can be no joy (on Earth). I have been living with my mom for the past two years. Notice that I did not say, “Parents”.
My mom repetitively says, “Son, I know that I fail as a mother. I’m sorry that I can’t do more for you”. Although sometimes it’s hard for me to admit, my mom has done more than enough for me. And when I think on these terms, I can’t help but choking up and saying to myself, “I could have done more for you as your son”.
Although no divorce papers were signed, my parents seem to live in their own contexts without the progressive feeling that their “family” will support them.
I try daily to be enthusiastic and loving through my phone call to my dad. I open up every conversation saying, “HI DADDY!” I want him to know that on the other line, he will always hear his one and only child always optomistic and hopeful for things to come.
I see my mom and dad’s brokenness, and ask God, “Please lay your hand over them. Guide them to your joyous Heaven”. Yet He constantly reminds me that these circumstances could be worse without Jesus overseeing my family. Time and time again, He promises smiles and laughter not only to me, but also to my mom and dad.